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Focus On Management skills – PART TWO

The Joy of Networking

In the last blog I covered networking and why it is so important to small to medium sized IVF clinics. At the end of the blog I looked at planning, strategy and the administrative aspects of networking.

However, I didn’t cover the interpersonal skills needed to network effectively. This is a separate issue and is the difference between organising a concert compared to playing in one!

Some people are described as party people, life and soul of the party or having the gift of the gab. These individuals seem to charm and make others resonate their own good cheer. But is this what makes a good networker? You’d certainly think that extroverts would have the edge over introverts when it comes to networking. But how true is it?

I put the question to Yvette Renda, Senior Director, BPA Quality Inc based in New York, Orlando, and the UK. Yvette is an expert with 25 years experience in organisational psychology and customer-services training. Yvette works with many blue-chip clients from Silicon Valley to Hollywood and clients in the automotive industry.

Introverts are natural fact finders

NM: So, to cut to the chase. When it comes to networking, extroverts have the edge, right?

YR: Wrong. Extroverts are generally better at breaking the ice, but after that it’s a level playing field. You have to remember that a networking situation is not like a sales situation where the salesperson has a specific agenda. Networking is more about fact finding, and introverts are natural fact finders.

NM: Introverts are fact finders?

YR: Yes. Obviously, I’m not talking about people who suffer from social anxiety. But I use three words to characterise introverts, reflective, focussed and self-reliant. Introverts go deeper and make time  to listen to what the other person is saying. They think to talk, rather than talk to think.

NM: I like that, think to talk! This has relevance in a networking situation where it would be waste of time to talk about the weather!

YR: Exactly. There’s a time and place for that kind of thing! Usually right up front when it’s good manners to find some common ground with the people you’re speaking to.

NM: If you were to come up with some simple rules of engagement for networking, what would be your approach?  Something that can be applied for both introverts and extroverts.

YR: OK. So, go back to what I just said about small talk and good manners.

RULE 1

In your introduction to the person you are about to network with combine BOTH. But keep the small talk relevant. My advice would be to introduce yourself and ask them for their thoughts on something. For instance, at a conference you might ask them what they thought of one of the plenary sessions? Or what brings them to the conference? If you know of the organisation they represent focus in a bit more. Let them know that you know something of their organisation and that you are impressed by it. Manners isn’t just common courtesy. It’s showing a real interest in the person you are conversing with.

RULE 2

Ask questions! And this is where introverts have a definite edge over extroverts. Because introverts think to talk, they tend to ask questions that are well-formed and intriguing to the person being questioned. People like a challenge, particularly when it’s in a sphere they are knowledgeable about. It gives them a chance to show off a bit.

NM: No danger of being perceived as a smart ass?

YR: Well. Yes. Let’s add a sub-rule to RULE 2: Don’t be a smart ass! I think the other thing is not to come across like Mr Spock doing some kind of data analysis of a specimen. Don’t think TOO hard about their answers. It’s important to remember that BOTH introverts and extroverts do best when engaged in authentic conversation. If you’re trying to think of relevant questions or if you’re not getting answers that are conducive to a conversation. Move on! Politely, of course!

RULE 3

Don’t break your head against a brick wall. Oddly enough, it’s extroverts who move on more quickly than introverts. The reason for this is simple! Introverts blame themselves for faltering communication and goad themselves into trying harder. Extroverts don’t usually have that kind of issue. They are happy to just shrug and find other fish to fry. In fact, it’s another way you can characterise introverts: they tend to be into quality, whereas extroverts favour quantity.

NM: Which is best in networking?

YR: Either. Or both. Because you are looking to make connections, what networking is all about both quantity and quality are important. If you were looking purely for immediate sales leads, then quality would be the answer. But networking is all about future possibilities that arise from connections. What’s perceived as a low-quality connection today might not be tomorrow. A person you meet who is irrelevant to your immediate business needs can become relevant simply by changing their job! Or by your own business evolving in the future to the extent that it requires their services.

RULE 4

A good rule of customer care is to treat your customer/potential network connection as THEY want to be treated. You often hear this life rule, treat others as YOU want to be treated. That’s a good start for basic human relations. But if you do that you can miss a trick, your customer might not want to be treated like you. If you are an extrovert and your customer is an introvert, they won’t enjoy a loud start the meeting. It’s worth thinking about in terms of other ways in which the rule might apply.

NM: So how might it apply in a networking situation?

YR: It requires more advanced skills. Firstly, it requires that you quickly assess another person’s natural preferences. Secondly, it requires that you can then adapt to modify your own interactive style to accommodate this. When applying this rule, one size definitely does not fit all!

NM: How do I hone my sleuthing skills in assessing another person’s preferences? And my flexible approach, what approaches are best?

YR: It brings me onto advice and training. It’s not a rule, but I advise ANYONE who is starting in a customer facing role to get some basic training! No matter what previous seniority you’ve held if you haven’t done customer facing before. In my view the best type is face-to-face sales training. These skills use positive language, questioning and looking for buying signals is expressly relevant to customer-facing. You get other techniques with sales training like personality types, how to deal with them and body language.

RULE 5

Look the part.  You’d be surprised! It’s funny, but humans are very visual. So, if you dress to impress, you WILL impress. People react to how you are presented, this in turn influences your own behaviour. If you dress to impress you will feel empowered after you’ve interacted with a few people! It’s the power of resonance.

NM: Even introverts?

YR: Especially introverts. Introverts who are pushed into social situations often adopt what I call a suit of armour! A business persona used for social situations as part of their job. A smart suit and relevant accessories often becomes part of that persona. If I hear someone say something like “I’ll wear my presentation suit!” I usually know that they are an introvert. There’s nothing wrong with that.

NM: Yes. I’ve had interview suits and presentation suits!

YR: So, you’re an introvert!

NM: I notice that’s not a question!

YR: No. It’s not a question. How do you feel about networking?

NM: Much better since I understood it. Before that, I hated networking. I’d been sales trained, and I found sales much easier because it was focused. But networking was nebulous and, I felt, aimless. So, I stood around feeling uncomfortable and not knowing what to do with myself while all the extroverts shined. If you’d asked me which I preferred, the dentists or networking, I’d have gone to the dentists every time.

YR: So, what changed?

NM: I applied a strategy and treated it like a sales meeting. Once goals and outcomes were expected, I could build it into a meaningful experience. I also got older and my skin thicker!

YR: So, I’ve given my advice. What would yours be?

Know the basics of human interaction and communication

NM: The first article we did on this, I went into the strategy of networking. People in IVF clinics need to know to formulate a strategy to get something out of networking. I’d also echo your advice about getting some formal face-to-face customer service training, even if I was an extrovert. After all, a bull-in-a-china shop extrovert is as capable of making a mess of a customer interaction as an introvert. Customer training doesn’t have to be extensive, just enough to know the basics of human interaction and communication.

YR: When you say customer-facing or customer relationship training, who do you think is the customer?

NM: Everyone.

YR: Right. And how important is that for IVF clinics?

NM: Massively important. The world of IVF is multi disciplinary on the professional front, there are patients, and contractor/supplier connections at all levels. It is emotional, cutting edge, and intense. It definitely helps to have a portfolio of communication skills to hand, including those pertaining to networking. So, thanks for your rules! Any last thoughts?

YR: Yes. Try and make yourself memorable at networking events to the person you are connecting with. After all, you DO have something important to say because that is why you are there in the first place! Thanks for having me!

NM: Thanks for sharing your knowledge with us.

So, to sum up.

Here are Yvette’s 5 rules for networking:

  1. Combine good manners with small talk, which should always be relevant.
  2. Ask questions and keep the conversation authentic.
  3. If you can’t have an authentic conversation, move on politely.
  4. Treat your potential network connection as THEY want to be treated.
  5. Look the part you want to be!

And lastly, make sure you make a memorable impression!

Neil Madden, Editor

The Fertility Hub